The New War on Breakfast

I am proposing a war on breakfast foods being put into a box labeled “Breakfast Foods.”

A list of good breakfast foods that are not “Breakfast Foods”:

• cold pizza

• hot pizza

• pasta

• rice

• dandelions, if you’re into that sort of thing

• broccoli

• a bowl of ice cream

• steak, directly followed by a Kit Kat bar

• leftovers

• watermelon

• chicken nuggets, especially at three in the morning

• seriously, leftovers for breakfast is a gift from God

• literally anything

• except asparagus, but not because it’s not good enough; it’s just not good period and nobody should be subjected to it

• macaroni

This is about the acceptance and normalization of non-breakfast foods being eaten for breakfast. Please, stop the stigma.